Tag Archives: Theo Raeken

Teen Wolf, Season Five, Episode Fifteen: “Amplification”

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Do you know the way to San Jose?

Spoiler Thoughts:

    • I’m glad they all let Lydia just hang out all safe and all in Arkam Asylum all this time.
    • If I was even remotely close to critical, I’d have a living will made out demanding I be taken to Hill Valley Hospital.
    • “Put my body out on the street before you take me to Beacon Memorial.”
    • I feel like Melissa has enough experience by now to not hang around when a creepy elevator gets to her floor.
    • Somebody take up a collection and buy poor Parrish a shirt.
    • I’m not so sure I think drilling a hole in someone’s head is going to release anything but cerebrospinal fluid.
    • If you are in this pack, and you are still questioning Stiles’ plans like they have a chance of success, you might have already got a hole drilled into your head.
    • Well I guess we’d feel worse for that orderly, but she was kind of a bitch to Lydia, so…good luck.
    • Liam, surprised that Scott’s Mom is still mad at him for almost killing him.
    • I wish Kira wasn’t always the weak link.
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You gotta win one for the Asians, Kira.
    • No one thinks she can do this Scott. Her results are not confidence-inspiring.
    • Why don’t they just knock this dude out and take his keycard?
    • Who’d notice outside? It’s not like Eichen House spends on outside lighting.
    • This Eichen House guard is the only person in Beacon Hills trying to do his job right.
    • Poor naked Nelson.
    • Poor naked electrified Nelson.
    • Did Kira and Malia really think short shorts were the best break-in outfits?
    • Maybe they would have had a better chance of blending if they stole some scrubs too.
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    • Dead.
    • Wow, Kira is producing sub-optimal results with this standing-and-doing-nothing method.
    • Deucalion! So good.
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I am badder than thou.
  • I’m not sure they have time for a brawl at this point.
  • This would have been a more suspenseful episode if we didn’t already know Theo and his gang end up walking out with Lydia.
  • Mrs. Martin should probably go home.
  • Everyone seems a little more surprised at the naked man on fire than you’d think, considering they were expecting him.
  • These fights are always the ones where I wonder why everyone suddenly forgot they could change into super powerful creatures.
  • I guess Mountain Ash, but they did just break apart a steel door.
  • This wasn’t enough to make Liam angry?
  • Can’t help thinking Posey just got tired of putting on the makeup. Now, a werewolf transformation consists of contacts and a couple of dental caps.

Teen Wolf, Season Five, Episode Fourteen: “The Sword and the Spirit”

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Spoiler Thoughts:

    • Gerard meets the Dread Doctors.  Not sure which is more creepy.
    • How is it that evil people are always so much more effective than good?
    • Oh, all the ugh.
    • You know it’s a good sitch when the beetles are screaming.
    • While I trust Theo, Malia, maybe shouldn’t.
    • Wow, that needle was so long, I’m surprised it didn’t stick out the other side of her neck.
    • Oh, we found out blond deputy’s name!  Strauss!
    • What kind of weapon falls apart if you twist the hilt?
    • Oh Malia.  This looks pretty bad.
    • Worst refraction ever.
    • This pack is not so much with communication.
    • Bad news when Malia is the peacemaker.
    • This is probably a bad move, Liam.
    • How messed up are things when Scott totally creeped me out just now.
    • Aw, Scott forgave his BB.
    • Braeden is the only one with any sense.
    • Poor Lydia has probably not seen any of the other regulars in like a year now.
    • That is a harsh school, when they want you to do homework while you’re in a coma.
    • Lydia’s Mom apparently doesn’t ship it.
    • Did Scott stop bleeding finally?
    • Oh hi Gerard.
    • “Who’s the old guy?”  Liam speaks for all the new viewers.
    • Wow Argent.  I’m not sure that’s covered by homeowner’s insurance.
    • Oh Theo.  That was maybe not trustworthy of you.
    • Parrish was not the best bomb defuser.
    • Gerard could maybe try burning Parrish’s hand or something.  Why’s he gotta go straight for the moneymaker?
    • The Argents have a difficult family dynamic.
    • Although I guess I’d take the Argent family over Malia’s.
    • OMG Lydia, break the damn glass already!
    • I can’t believe that creepy orderly still has a job.
    • Although maybe there is a limited pool of people willing to work at Eichen House.
    • The Beast…just wanted some furniture?
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I’ll just take this, thanks.
    • I like how the Beast broke through the wall and got a chair.  Like Ikea was too far.
    • Hello Handsome.

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  • Ok, I know a lot of things happened at the last minute, Deucalion, but I believe it was Scott that helped restore your sight in the first place.
  • Everybody made up!  Or at least hates each other less now!

Teen Wolf, Season Five, Episode Twelve: “Damnatio Memoriae”

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Spoiler Thoughts:

  • I wouldn’t be a Beacon Hills deputy for all the tea in China.
  • Ugh. I am totally watching poor Hayden’s sister walking around this murder building with my eyes partly closed so I don’t have to see her getting eaten.
  • Lol. I can’t tell whether that thing looks more like the police officer that was after Stitch, or the dog-demon thing in Ghostbusters.
  • I think she’s already running, ma’am.
  • Liam, I’m not sure Hayden’s all that into you.
  • Chimera girl has some unresolved Dad issues.
  • “You know what it is, don’t you?” Maybe you, Parrish?
  • Also, what the Hell happened to Parrish, after he melted out the gate at Eichen House?  He never seems that fazed about his alternate personality jaunts.
  • You’d think he’d at least start running out of shirts.
  • Although I guess you’d think they’d all start running out of shirts by now.
  • Glad Scott figured out what every teenage girl figures out eventually, and wore a red shirt.
  • Scott is not so much with the string theory.
  • Argent may not actually understand what a safe is for.
  • Good Lord, Stiles. Why would you go down into the basement?
  • Why is the whole hospital empty, if this isn’t a dream?
  • Well a) I do feel Stiles is smart enough to have appreciated this distinction a long time ago, and b) Sheriff Stalinski might be on morally grey ground here.
  • Although, let’s face it:  Who among us would not shred evidence for Stiles?
  • Aw. Stiles metaphorically had his eyes turned, like Derek.
  • Oh Derek. Where art thou?
  • Theo is kind of running a hedonistic pack.
  • Man, for a minute, I thought Scott was hearing heartbeats in Malia. Like she was having twins.
  • Deaton! I had totally forgotten what had happened to him.
  • Mason is the best.
  • Lydia’s situation doesn’t seem to have improved.
  • Oh ugh. It’s the bathtub where Lydia got traumatized by her grandma’s trepanning.
  • Oh we are going all Crimson Peak up in here.
  • Fun fact:  You grab someone’s arm and tell them “this isn’t a threat,” it’s pretty much a threat.
  • Scott is not a whiz at bandaging.
  • No touchee, Theo.
  • Oh hey, this is sounding more and more threat-y.
  • Mason is Liam’s Stiles.
  • Not to be too picky Lydia, since she seems like the only one who’s helping you, but wasn’t curly haired girl evil before?
  • I’m not so sure this little test would convince me that Theo and I were on the same side.
  • Liam, King of the Screwed Up.
  • I would maybe not totally trust undead evil Hayden.
  • OMG. How is Gerard STILL alive?
  • Wow.
  • Does…this facility not serve salads?
  • Some discreet product placement.
  • Pretty elaborately done hair, for girls who were buried in the ground.

Teen Wolf, Season Five, Episode Eleven: “The Last Chimera”

Photo from MTV Press.

Spoiler Thoughts:

  • Ugh. I’m not sure trepanning is standard of care.
  • Oh, well at least Lydia didn’t get Kali Ma’d like Theo’s sister.
  • Wasn’t this the guy who had an eye in his forehead?
  • I can’t believe this awful creepy orderly is the only guy who never gets killed.
  • How does this girl not know the Sheriff when Stalinsky is in the ER like every week?
  • Scott’s looking a little peaked.
  • That’s not doing it good, Scott.
  • “Someone’s dying.”  It was almost you, Parrish.
  • Oh good thing he spun out right across the street from the Forest.
  • You know, Parrish, most people would pack a flashlight before flares.
  • Scott’s having one of those “heavy flow” days.
  • I feel like maybe everyone got so enamored of Dark!Angsty! Stiles, we’ve forgotten how funny he can be. Can we get happy funny Stiles back someday?
  • Well Stiles, how do you like getting the brunt of someone’s misdirected rage?
  • It has never, in the history of ever, been a good idea to check anyone into Eichen House.
  • It’s nice that everyone in town happens to be related to someone working at the hospital.
  • Liam’s Dad is all “why can’t my kid be like Mason.”
  • I wish I could walk into a library and have the book I need be the first one I randomly lift off the shelf.
  • Again, if only we had paid more attention to Danny’s school project on Telluric currents a couple years ago…
  • Mason is too good for this world.
  • Way to not sound like a total psycho, Parrish.
  • It’s been so long, I don’t remember why Malia knows what this kid looks like. I assume she fought him while everyone was out having individual issues.
  • Liam stopped off at the Zac Efron salon on the way to the Nemeton.
  • It’s always night at the Nemeton.
  • If Stiles doesn’t have a subdural by this time, it’ll be a miracle.
  • Argent’s entry would be a little more badass if it looked like he was even denting these guys a little bit.
  • Well I guess Scott was ok with giving away that whole “Theo doesn’t know I’m alive” advantage.
  • I’m actually with Theo on his assessment of Eichen House. Giving it a “would not recommend” on Yelp.

Teen Wolf, Season Five, Episode Ten: “Status Asthmaticus”

Screencap from http://teen-wolf-mtv.wikia.com/wiki/Teen_Wolf_Wikia

Spoiler Thoughts:

  • Not the jeep, Stiles!  The jeep is probably the only blameless thing in this whole town.
  • Wow, these paste-on commercials for whatever this girl sticking her tongue out is for, are really annoying.  They could at least try to avoid sticking one straight over Hayden’s face.
  • Not looking like this is going to be a great night for Liam.
  • This is a really strange first date for Lydia and Parrish.
  • If Parrish is a Hellhound, I feel like we would have at some point seen him as…well, a hound?
  • You know, if we knew that Parrish goes all garbage man when he falls asleep, maybe someone could have gone and got the poor guy a Red Bull or 6-Hour Energy Drink or something?
  • Oh Theo.  So pretty.  So awful.
  • You know, by this time, so many people have become chimeras, I have no idea whether I’m supposed to recognize blood-slurping-guy or not.
  • Braeden’s back!  Ok, if Derek comes back, all the trauma of this season is forgiven.
  • Theo wants Void!Stiles?  Is that even still a thing?
  • Is there some Nogitsune left in Stiles?  If there isn’t, what use is he to the pack?
  • You know, Liam might not be the best Beta.
  • Why doesn’t Scott just leave from wherever Liam got in through the Mountain Ash?
  • Mason gets the absolute worst jobs.
  • I feel like Mrs. McCall should probably go ahead and go to medical school if she’s going to have this level of medical expertise.
  • …Because you’re EEEVIIILLL, Theo.  Also, pretty.
  • Those are some not very convincing chest compressions, but I guess at least the thump got results.
  • Scott and Mrs. McCall are the best.
  • Be your anchor and bring us hope, Scott.


Teen Wolf, Season Five, Episode Two: “Parasomnia”

Screencap from http://teen-wolf-mtv.wikia.com/wiki/Teen_Wolf_Wikia

Spoiler Thoughts:

  • Lydia’s Mom’s back! Hope she was able to sell that Lake house after all the crap the gang put it through.
  • Well nothing like people vomiting up black oil on your desk to start a new year.
  • Denton! It’s always nice when we know someone didn’t die.
  • Oh great. Now he’ll probably turn into a were dog.
  • Happy probably-evil Theo.
  • Apparently this is the year where Everything’s Coming Up Liam.
  • Actually, that’s pretty much every year.
  • Really? UC Davis is the best school on the West Coast for Biological Sciences? I’m going to say there’s probably a few other schools who would like a word about this.
  • I’ve taken a lot of Biology courses, and a lot of AP courses.  As far as I can tell, this teacher with a degree in discouragement is not the norm.
  • Wow, these lockers are a lot bigger than the ones at my school.
  • I guess Lydia’s scar healed up?
  • Parrish is so totally under Lydia’s thumb, he could do her cuticles.
  • On the other hand, Parrish is a step up from pretty much every other boyfriend Lydia’s ever had.
  • Liam is kind of a liability on these stealth missions.
  • What kind of job does her Dad have, that he’s going to meet a client at a courthouse at like ten o’clock at night?
  • Poor Stiles. Poor paranoid, stalker-y Stiles.
  • Mason is so cool. He is way too together for Beacon Hills.
  • Aw. Theo did Liam a solid.
  • Parrish might not be the best guy on a stakeout.
  • There’s a new wolf in town?
  • Sheriff Stilinski’s ready to move on?  Maybe to Mrs. McCall?
  • Oh Theo. we had such hopes for you.