Are you watching this show? Do you wish someone would watch along with you because everyone else you know thinks it’s dumb? Here is what I was saying while I was watching it–I WILL WATCH WITH YOU.
Ok, a trip to Walt Disney World has us a couple weeks behind, but surely we can catch up.
[Notices it’s a two-hour show tonight.] Sigh.
Theo is homeless, and still has a nicer car than Scott or Stiles.
Theo, letting any spider crawl all over you is a bad idea, even if it wasn’t an evil Hell-spider.
Itai, Theo. And on the other hand, wow, that was some good aim.
Not a good day for Theo.
I guess it’s not so surprising that Scott has PTSD by now, as that it’s just manifesting now.
Vargas is totes ready to shoot Scott.
Mason is starting up the “Brett 8-pack Fan Club.”
“Yay sports!” Mason is all of us.
No Liam. Full confession to the supernatural murderer is a bad move.
Lydia should probably stop going back to Eichen House.
Poor Parrish. Lost out to the waves of Stydia shippers.
Parrish, maybe you shouldn’t show your Hellhound eyes to every obviously shady character in Beacon Hills.
Why in God’s Name would Corey even want to play lacrosse. His one talent is turning invisible at the first signs of peril.
Nothing good has ever happened in a Beacon Hills shower room.
You’d think Argent would at least have been in contact with Scott’s Mom, since they looked like they were starting a thing back in the haunted train station.
Look Dr. Fenris, it’s not Parrish’s fault that you haven’t been able to get a better job than paranormal control at Eichen House.
I’ll miss a lot about Teen Wolf, but not these creepy Old Spice Mom commercials.
This counselor is pretty unsympathetic.
No one ever turns the lights on in Beacon Hills High. I wouldn’t step foot in that place without a Kleig light on me at all times.
Lydia, maybe your first response to someone getting murdered in Eichen House shouldn’t be going over there without having contacted anyone or told anyone where you’re going.
Dr. Fenris, the thing where we don’t kill people isn’t really a “faith” issue. It’s more of an “evil” issue.
Of course, if Lydia packed a gun, she wouldn’t need to blow out her vocal cords all the time.
I don’t know if I get behind Malia-Scott (Scalia?) He seems so earnest for her.
Argent loves spooking these kids.
Why on Earth would they think Aaron is ok, when he’s just sitting in an empty classroom by himself at night with the lights off?
Man, who would have thought that curing and resuscitating the worst human alive would come back to bite you on the butt?
Are you watching this show? Do you wish someone would watch along with you because everyone else you know thinks it’s dumb? Here is what I was saying while I was watching it–I WILL WATCH WITH YOU.
Sheriff, this seems like it would be more surprising if we hadn’t already verified that everyone in Beacon Hills had been taken last week?
How, In All That Is Holy, is Theo going to help them against the Ghost Riders?
What makes anyone think they can possibly stop Theo with bullets when he inevitably goes rogue?
A whole roomful of you couldn’t deal with one Ghost Rider. I think you might be a little optimistic, Liam.
Well that could have gone better.
I feel like taking yourself to the brink of death to solve your problems is starting to be a habit with them.
Oh, no wonder Theo wasn’t a fan of going back to the hospital.
It sounds weird for Lydia to refer to their school as “the high school.”
Virtually every high school student would, I think, refer to their school either by name or just as “school.”
This heart-to-heart with Liam is making Theo nostalgic for his looping Ringu Vine again.
Ok, there’s a lot I’m not understanding about this remembering process.
For one thing, if Scott’s too cold, why don’t they just back off the temperature dials some on that refrigerator coffin?
For another, it seems like they all remember Stiles pretty well now, given that they can all quote stuff he said recently, so maybe that’s not the issue?
Pretty harsh for Malia to have one of her handful of memories be Stiles in love with someone else.
Lydia hypnotizes pretty easy.
Wait, you can hatchet the Ghost Riders but not shoot them?
Ok, I believe I asked a couple weeks ago why we didn’t think their own guns would work against them.
Hope Theo’s prepared for the warm reception he’ll probably get from Stiles and everyone else in the train station.
Look! It’s Jesus! Or possibly Stiles!
“…Because you loved him.” Are you watching this show? Do you wish someone would watch along with you because everyone else you know thinks it’s dumb? Here is what I was saying while I was watching it–I WILL WATCH WITH YOU.
Theo’s sister, showing the “Once Upon A Time” folks what it really looks like to rip out a heart.
This part was never all that clear to me: So Theo killed his sister so…the Dread Doctors could give him her heart? So he could become a chimera?
It always kind of seemed like this was Theo doing it the hard way.
Theo’s not having a great Groundhog Day.
“It’s ok. You don’t have to stop.” OH OK, *rip*.
Malia not so much for forgiveness.
Scott letting the babby take the wheel.
Meanwhile, the sheriff is doing a little home renovation.
Claudia showing a lack of nonplussedness at finding a hidden room in her own house.
Ugh. If I was Theo, I’d rather go back to getting my heart ripped out than watch Liam and Hayden PDA.
What was that with his sister, anyway? Was it Theo hallucinating while Malia beat him up?
Look, if you’re going to analyze each idea to see if it’s bad, Stiles would never get anything done.
Given that Peter has gotten better from worse burns than this, and actually from
death, I’m not sure why he should be all that concerned. Fun fact: Just because a medication works topically, it doesn’t necessarily follow that it works injected into the heart.
Glad Peter not only recovered all his skin and hair, but also his stylish stubble.
I get the feeling Mrs. Martin still doesn’t get the whole “being a hero” thing.
Really? They never tried closing the doors to the cage before starting this whole debacle?
Given that the Ghost Rider kind of clearly has his mouth sewn shut, I’m not sure chatting is on the menu.
Poor Parrish is never privy to any of the plans, but always gets called in at the last minute to burn his shirt off.
I also still don’t get why Lenore didn’t just move to a different town?
Like, if everyone in my neighborhood disappeared, I’d either move, or take over everyone’s property by squatter’s rights and be a millionaire.
Evil or not, Peter is always the only guy in Beacon Hills who ever looks like he’s having fun.
I like how after awhile, anyone can talk to the Ghost Rider and understand him. Like Parrish was just the catalyst.
Parrish must have to buy shirts by the dozen.
Man, don’t you hate it when the Ghost Riders hypnotize your Hellhound?
Maybe they should try grabbing him around his pelvis, since apparently that part never catches fire?
Mr. Douglas came by, presumably to start singing “Tomorrow Belongs to Me.”
I feel like Malia didn’t have her plan all that well worked out.
Here’s a thought: Why doesn’t Theo remake the barrier as soon as Douglas goes through, thereby trapping both of them in there?
Parrish going off for some alone time?
Wow, the Ghost Riders have an enormous pineal gland. No wonder Douglas was so anxious to munch on one.
Peter finds himself small fry for once.
Meanwhile, Corey’s all “wonder where everyone else went to?”
Mr. Douglas wanted to disappear an invisible guy with a magical whip for a long time?
That was a very specific longing.
Mason never gets a break.
Man, worst Canaan Day block party ever.
I love the guy who is trying to skateboard away from the Ghost Riders.
I guess the reason no one gets in their car to drive away from the Ghost Riders is because cars are generally faster than horses and it would make for a pretty short story.
Good thing Canaan is like next door to Beacon Hills.
How do they think they’re going to do surgery on Argent without getting a consent?
Theo! Well, hard to trust him by now.
Oh hey, hi creepy pineal gland eating guy.
You know, Liam, this dude might not, strictly speaking, be trustworthy.
“Go after him!” That’s right Scott, tell the one person who has no supernatural speed and is wearing heels to go chase the kid down.
Guess what? Virtually every medication Melissa probably gives in the hospital will also probably kill you if dosed incorrectly.
It’s probably the least amount of pressure she could be under.
I feel like maybe Argent could have given the recipe
before he started passing out. How is trapping a Ghost Rider going to help us? It doesn’t seem like they are big talkers.
Liam, maybe you should consider having more than one idea.
This lady super loves living in Canaan.
It has been so long since Scott werewolfed, he forgot how?
Hope Caleb doesn’t wish us into the cornfield.
I’m not so sure we needed a date on the video to know that Caleb was different.
Oh, banshee convention in Canaan.
If I had a choice, I’d totally bring back Kira’s Mom over Kira too.
Hope Kira isn’t needing her sword wherever she is, because her Mom snagged it.
Maybe you should wait until Scott gets back and discuss this, Liam?
Tamlyn beating tracks out of there, once again showing superior survival skills to everyone else in Beacon Hills.
Finally SOMEONE was persuaded to put on the werewolf makeup again.
I feel as if watching the same scene over again would have been more effective if we didn’t already know what Ghost Riders looked like?
“You can kill whoever you want” seems like a bad promise to make to Theo.
“Where’s Scott? Where’s Stiles?” Theo frantically looking for anyone with a brain.
So the Ghost Hunters brought back her dead son? Or did her banshee-ness bring him back?
Scott is beginning to think it was a bad idea to give Liam his housekey.
Well I think the difference between Lydia and Lenore is that Lydia could conceivably move to Los Angeles after everyone gets taken, instead of just staying in Beacon Hills like a crazy person.
Apparently Sheriff Stalinski hasn’t been told about Claudia’s affection for that piece of wallpaper.
I see London, I see France…
See, I feel like I missed something here. When did we figure out the pike was the cane? How did Gerard get his mitts on it?
I’m hammering out danger. I’m hammering out a warning.
Deaton is all “no Stiles. Being a vet doesn’t make me an expert on fetal cannibalism.”
Theo, this might not be a good time for this, given as how you’re exsanguinating.
Now, I’m not sure how Theo’s killing her here, because every other time we’ve seen this, someone’s jabbed their hand straight into the abdomen, which seems kind of effective.
Here, he’s just kind of…hugging her to death? Even though she’s clearly spiking him with paralytic toxin?
Well we’d feel worse about this, but Tracy was kind of a jerk anyway.
Deucalion is always thinking “amateur.”
How to Succeed in Werewolfing Without Really Trying
Sebastien picked up all Mason’s knowledge like a planarian.
Wow. Who would have thought that a still-alive evil force would be a problem when it woke up? Besides everyone?
The next American Idol.
Ok, I don’t even know how Sebastien could tell this was Marcel. It looked like raw meat in a trench coat.
What was Marcel’s deal anyway? Sebastien didn’t seem all that into him.
Sometimes you should just Let It Go.
I feel like Malia wouldn’t just be cowering upstairs while Braeden plays Battleship with the Desert Wolf all by herself.
This whole “life is energy and can’t just be gone” theory seems a little less plausible when you consider…death?
Poor Lydia. She is getting all the crap this season.
Isn’t a nine millimeter pretty small? I might go with the musket.
Sheriff, debating how much damage his pachinko-ball gun will do.
Clark, this is a bad time to get insubordinate.
RIP Mrs. McCall’s house.
We always hear of how good Talia Hale was. We also know how anybody (except Scott) becomes an alpha wolf, tho…
Theo, how are you ever going to get a pack when you keep trying to kill everyone even on speaking terms with you?
Theo is beginning to look less trustworthy
Lydia has pretty much run through her medical deductible by now.
Argent, lowering the boom down on Emo!Parrish!
Ugh. We get to listen to Kira’s rambling voice mail twice.
Yeah, I’m not so sure this is exactly how cortisone works.
Plan A was Chipotle?
Man, no one’s healing powers are working worth a damn lately.
By this time, you’d think everyone would be wearing rubber soled shoes.
Stiles, son. What would make you think you should even say boo to the Desert Wolf?
Sebastien is having a hard time taking any werewolf in a hoodie seriously.
Sebastien not a fan of today’s “Abercrombie & Fitch” werewolves.
He is not impressed with Theo’s power-taking abilities.
I KNEW we could trust Deucalion!
I TRUST HIM
Ouch. Deucalion practices tough love.
Gerard, you rat-bastard!
Argent continues to not be anybody’s fool.
Word of advice: Don’t accept an invitation to the Argent’s family dinner.
Shortly before they started singing “Cat’s Cradle.”
Again, I don’t feel like Malia would make such a poor showing here. She was pretty determined to kill her Mom before, and yet in this whole standoff, I’m not sure she gets one punch in.
Ouch. Clawed her right in the ovaries.
Unless that shard is way off in his shoulder, Stiles should probably be concerned about a punctured lung, I’m thinking.
Liam once again looks like he stopped off at the barber shop while he was prowling around the sewers.
How does that possibly belong to you, Sebastien? Your sister made it with her own blood. You just…leaned on it a little, once.
Look, he just wants the pike his sister impaled him on so he can eat everyone with impunity. Is that so wrong?
Dude can wipe up the place with Scott and Liam, just from drinking out of a puddle.
God Damn it Corey, you are totally useless.
OH. SNAP. Theo just had the worst International Woman’s Day ever.
Glad it worked out a little better for Liam than it did for Derek.
Well TBH, Sheriff, Stiles probably had less to do in this story than in any other season.
The Skinwalkers are all “uhm…could you hurry this up a bit?”
Well I think it was nice to include Alison in this end montage, but it does kind of accentuate the notion that Kira is Scott’s Knives Chau and not Ramona Flowers.
Although this season has maybe some more inexplicable plot elements than a lot of the earlier years, I thought it was pretty good.
I like the atmosphere of Eichen House, although it’s hard to know by now why anyone would go there ever, when there is everything but bats hanging from the windows.
I think Parrish turned out to be a little of a red herring this season, since there really wasn’t some big cataclysmic battle between the Hellhound and the Beast.
Actually, most of the fights between them, the Beast came out looking kind of bored.
Kira was really the weakest link this season, and it’s probably a good idea that she goes away and gets some core competencies under her belt before she tries to be a part of the Scooby gang again.
Not a huge fan of Hayden as of yet, but she’s definitely improved from her start. I guess we’ll see if she holds onto her undead-dark side.
Poor Theo. Even though he was such a cool bad guy, if you think about it, virtually none of his schemes ever worked at all.
In large part, no doubt, due to Deucalion. I refuse to believe a bullet could do more than slow him down, so I imagine we’ll be seeing him again someday.
Pretty meager storyline for Stiles overall, although maybe Dylan was busy with
Scorch Trials, and they had to write around him. Well, until next season,
Teen Wolf. Now back to pick up those earlier seasons I missed…
Poor Mason. It’s not enough to be the Beast, but he has to wake up in a sewage tunnel too.
I feel like we saw Mason outside Eichen House trying to shut off the power while the Beast was inside, tho.
Is there some reason Gerard never told anyone he knows how to totally paralyze the Dread Doctors anytime he wants?
Why did Corey think it was a good idea to take Mason away from Scott and Liam in the first place? He can’t have really thought they were going to kill him.
Electro guy is not buying the mask job.
I trust him.
He’s so smart.
Hm. Not sure why it looks like Gideon Emery has a droopy eyelid this episode.
Electro guy is not an idiot.
I feel your pain Parrish. I just got new tires too. Then the whole car broke down and had to be traded in…Wait, what were we doing again?
“I have the word ‘Hell’ in my name! Hell!”
Scott has a lot on his plate. Most of it sucks.
Stiles finally gets to be funny again for the first time in like two years.
Liam is the worst in forests.
Scott’s healing powers not only fix his wounds, but they do dry cleaning as well.
Oh, I kind of think it was your fault, Corey.
Worst spinal tap ever.
I’m not so sure these are very good doctors.
Theo’s team building skills are taking a pounding here.
Now you know Theo is evil, because Gideon Emery’s voice isn’t going to get on
anyone’s nerves. Oh God, Kira should not be this dumb.
Yeah that’s right Theo. Taste of a real Alpha.
If I was Electro guy, I’d have been inching towards the door from the time Deucalion stood up.
If I was Tracy, I’d be thinking “either he puts on the mask and gets what he wants and we go hunt the beast, or the mask kills him and I don’t have to worry about him coming for me next.”
This Nemeton brought to you by Toyota Corolla.
Yeah, this doesn’t seem like a bright alliance.
I think it’s pretty obvious that Tracy does not want the same thing.
I don’t even know why Scott needed those guys. They didn’t even know it was Mason in the first place.
Sad that Derek isn’t here. Don’t you think someone would have asked Braeden about him by now?
The story of this season, is Scott’s BFFs telling not to trust Theo, and Scott doing it anyway.
Would you buy a used car from this man?
Ugh. Kira. How does she possibly think she’s going to drive off and accomplish whatever and get back before everything’s over?
What if they just cut the tubing and ran for it with the thing still in his neck?
Argent, do you honestly think Gerard is not majorly playing you?
The only good thing is that as soon as Deucalion sees Gerard, he may forget about Scott altogether.
Dread Doctors laying down the sick burn on Theo.
Maybe punching a steel mask isn’t the best strategy, Theo.
I like how Posey and Sprayberry must have had specific limits to how many times they put on the wolf makeup written into their contracts, because Theo is the only one doing any wolfing here.
Ok if you had done that like 15 minutes ago, Mason, you’d all be out of there by now.
Braeden is too smart for this town.
Mrs. McCall is going to wish Scott had gotten that scholarship when she gets the repair bills after this.
Uhm…any reason why Braeden didn’t just unload both barrels of her never-depleted shotgun into her at that point?
Ok, Scott and Liam have just spent about a day’s worth of shooting, sitting by this cabinet flinching a lot.
Beast can literally not believe the naked flaming guy jumping at him.
This dude died, then was brought back by unholy means, but at least it gave him a nice haircut.
How could this guy possibly know Gerard’s last name? Does he have Mason’s memories?
Why fight matches usually have weight divisions.
If the best encouragement Theo could give me to attack someone was “you’ll heal,” I might start thinking he didn’t have my best interests at heart.
Parrish seems like he’s going pretty easy on people trying to poison and electrocute him.
What in God’s Name did the guy whose superpower is
changing colors think he was going to do against a Hellhound? So you kind of tapped the guy trying to electrocute you against the wall, but fried the guy who was holding your wrist? Harsh, Parrish.
Man, Mason may need a new date for the prom.
Theo, if you want to recruit people for your pack, maybe perforating them with a steel bar isn’t the best opener.
Man, her hair is pretty curly still, for all that writhing around.
I trust him.
Deucalion, giving out fatherly advice. He’s such a giver.
Scott isn’t the best spy.
Huh, I totally thought Meredith was dead by now.
Scorpion girl is pretty psycho.
You would think Kira would have read up on electricity after she discovered she
was electricity. All this whining and self-doubt isn’t really getting the job done, Kira.
It’s a measure of how messed up Teen Wolf usually is, that it never occurred to me how weird this scene where they just casually stroll through the room of cringing naked guys was until way afterwards.
In Beacon Hills, we call this “Tuesday.”
Maybe Meredith was just trying to say your skin was soft, Scott. No need to immediately start thinking everyone wants to get stabbed in the back of the neck.
Liam seems to be sweating it a little here.
It’s ok Liam. Just use all that energy you had when you TRIED TO KILL SCOTT.
Parrish seems like he’s probably a little occupied right now, with the impalement and all.
Poor paralyzed Deucalion. I trust him.
Theo, you have a better chance at Brother of the Year award than of ever getting Stiles to trust you.
Killing your sister =/= believing in Santa on the naïveté scale.
Valach could have at least put on Sinatra or something.
Poor Parrish is constantly waking up completely confused and horrified. And probably chilly.
Malia and Electroguy having the worst trust exercise ever.
Stiles and Theo are the Mulder/Krycek equivalent.
Theo: King of the Unconvincing Rationalization
Lydia would probably be more sympathetic to Valach’s sad history if he hadn’t just
drilled a hole into her head. Lydia is horrified at having to wear that ugly hat.
Posey makes the worst face here. Like he’s had experience lighting aerosol cans before and none of it was good.
Mason is my spirit animal.
Oh wow, that is why I don’t like loud noises.
Dylan, keeping in shape for Maze Runner 3.
Theo is always the bridesmaid, never the bride.
Mason is all of us.
So unpleasant, Hayden. Don’t you be mean to Mason.
Parrish burnt through the Mountain Ash?
Isn’t the point of ash, it’s what doesn’t get burnt up?
Wow, Parrish totally did the Charles Atlas “go away little man” maneuver on Stiles.
Well to be fair, Mrs. Martin, you did put her into that Hellhole.
This is really taking a toll on that poor jeep.
Scott’s all “worst backseat passengers ever.”
Deaton, man, you knew they were coming–why for did you not have that stuff drawn up already?
Deaton, man, you know how to check if something’s alive or dead. Why for are you making Stiles go through this?
Well to be fair, the other guys did help a little.
But maybe Lydia’s Mom will get off Stiles’ back now.
Coach! Coach is coming back!
Enjoyable things courtesy of an enigmatic world.