Once Upon A Time, S5E09: “The Bear King”

Spoiler Thoughts:
  • Oh good.  Merida, the Princess of Questionable Judgement.
  • Man, going all the way to Scotland seems like we’re taking the long way around on this one.
  • Oh hey, it’s Queen Elinor, who looks nothing like any of her kids, and was once poisoned by her daughter to turn into a bear.
  • As soon as anyone gets a little bit of magic, they suddenly become Monty Hall.
  • Signing an IOU for something you don’t know in the future always goes well.
  • Turning into a bear also always goes well.
  • Why wouldn’t Elinor become queen?  Isn’t she already queen?
  • Wasn’t that the whole point of “Brave,” that everything was going to fall apart without Elinor ruling everyone?
  • Oh look.  Mulan.
  • Wasn’t Mulan hanging with Robin the last time we saw her?
  • Wow, that helm does not look like it fits Fergus.
  • Hey, that’s remarkable.  A scene with four characters, and I dislike all of them.
  • A happy ending of that scene would have been the Earth opening up and swallowing them all and we go back to Granny’s for burgers.
  • Do we even know if Fergus knew what the helm does?  It’s not like Merida knew her mom was going to turn into a bear.
  • Oh wow, Red’s back!
  • Hate it when people put you under their thrall.
  • Flashback to when there were more than 5 people living in Storybrooke!
  • The original Birds of Prey team!
  • Actually, are we sure the point of the helm wasn’t to kill Fergus by making Merida miss, so the clans would unite under Merida?
  • Arthur is such a heel.
  • Oh for God’s Sake.  Why does Arthur have to do anything?  Clearly, Zelina could just magic them and the helm away in an instant.
  • Wow.  This is the stupidest move ever.  Why would you let these guys go when they could just come back as soon as Zelina wakes up?
  • I feel like these louts wouldn’t go honorable so fast.
  • Before we get all warm and fuzzy about the witch, let’s not forget that the witch enslaved Red for years.
  • Don’t we think Elinor would have liked to see Fergus too?
  • No, you have something in your eye.

Review: “Dragon Age: Magekiller” # 1

by Greg Rucka, Carmen Carnero, Terry Pallot, Michael Atiyeh, and Sachin Teng

Magekillers #1 starts a new chapter in the world of Thedas, as Greg Rucka brings us a story of mage-killing mercenaries set in the Dragon Age universe.

While this first book has the burden of setting up and introducing new readers to the extensive lore of Thedas, it cleverly interweaves the exposition with a dramatic battle illustrating the dangers of blood magic and apostates.  Your leads in this journey are Tessa and Marius–a glib scoundrel and a taciturn ex-slave from Tevinter; partners who seem more than a little familiar to those who rolled a rogue purple Hawke and romanced Fenris in Dragon Age II.

If people new to the Dragon Age franchise will have a reasonable amount of backstory explained to them, veterans will have a few nods as well, as references are made to such storyline staples as the literary works of Varric Tethras.

The art is beautiful and the story seems expertly paced and placed, as the characters begin what promises to be a dicey assignment in Minrathous–capital of Tevinter, and likely important location for the hinted-at sequel to Dragon Age Inquisition.  Although few details about our heroes’ job or their illustrious employer are handed out this time around, the potential is certainly vast enough for me to hold my interest for the upcoming issues.

Dragon Age:  Magekillers #1 release date:  December 16, 2015.



Once Upon A Time, S5E08: “Birth”

Spoiler Thoughts:
  • Wow, that was not so smooth, Charming.
  • A legendary Prince, Pirate, and Thief, and the only thing that even slowed down Arthur was a tree root.
  • Jennifer Morrison is getting a lot of shouting practice in recently.
  • Oh Hook. Emma does and does for you.
  • Aw. Hook was looking into real estate. Romantic and a good investment.
  • Hm. Zelina’s doing premature labor the really hard way.
  • Regina’s all “whose dark magic?” Because we kind of have an assortment of choices by now.
  • Meanwhile, Hook’s idea of how to get a hold of Emma is to just wander around town yelling her name. He really never did get the hang of cell phones.
  • Good thing he’s yelling EMMA SWAN, in case there’s another dark Emma in town.
  • Zelina is learning the benefits of organic eating a little too late.
  • Oh, Dr. Whale is back! And creepy as ever!
  • Hey, remember when he was Dr. Frankenstein?
  • And slept with Snow White?
  • Holy Mackerel. Is Dr. Whale even in the same show as everybody else?
  • Well here’s a thought: What if Emma just magic bopped Arthur instead of Merlin, he dropped the sword, and Merlin wasn’t under his command anymore?
  • Wow. You had Arthur literally under your boot, and let him waddle away and free Zelina?
  • For that matter, once Zelina was free, why would Arthur have to run? Now he could have Zelina get the sword from Hook and be back to baseline again.
  • I’m not sure these people are thinking this through all that well.
  • Why is it the dagger doesn’t command explicit obedience when Regina uses it?
  • Having actually delivered babies, I can say that most mothers do not look like Zelina right after delivery.
  • Well at least someone threw Whale across the room.
  • Aw. They kissed the flame on.
  • This must be the first time anyone in Storybrooke ever kept a bargain.
  • I don’t know. Emma’s plan has a certain logic to it.
  • I don’t really get this wound thing. Even if it didn’t heal, why would it get worse?
  • …What?
  • Wow, this was kind of a complex plan for her to make up on the spot.
  • Also, glad that Regina and Merlin just stood around while all this happened. Did they forget they had magic too?
  • So…is it the actual act of tethering someone to a blade that makes them evil? Why would that be?
  • Then, when Arthur tethered Merlin, he made him evil? And Emma took his evil and put it in Killian to tether him to his blade?
  • Evil is like velcro?
  • Why does everyone else seem to understand this immediately?
  • If I were Killian, I think I would probably give Zelina a poke with Excalibur while I had them both there, just for stabbing me in the heart earlier.

Heroes Reborn, Season One, Episode 108: “June 13th: Part Two”

Image from NBC.com

Spoiler Thoughts:

  • I’m glad everyone takes everything Erica says as gospel.
  • Don’t do it, HRG. Too many butterflies.
  • Wow, that was a bad job HRG.
  • I’m not sure Erica’s going to bleed out immediately from a bullet wound through the side of her thigh.
  • Wow, Hiro got a raw deal here.
  • I don’t remember Peter actually absorbing people’s powers, as much as he just gained them.
  • He’s not going to see Claire in a year, HRG–you didn’t even see Claire.
  • Hey, maybe Rene survived in this timeline.
  • Oh HRG. You really should dump those memories now.
  • Ok, see look HRG. This is what people do when they find their dead kids. They uncover them to make sure it’s them.
  • Parkman!
  • Dammit, Parkman.
  • Alright Caspar!
  • Still don’t care about Los Angeles Batman.
  • Otomo-san has unfortunately backed the wrong horse.
  • HRG, you done screwed up bad.
  • Katana Girl’s origin story!
  • Hiro got older…and looks more like he did back in the day.
  • Nathan speaks Japanese!
  • I knew that RN looked familiar.
  • Wow, Nathan was a lot cooler than Tommy.
  • Otomo-san and Miko are the cutest.
  • Looking like my prediction that this poor frozen water EVO is going to be the first guy Zach’s crazy wife kills was exactly correct.
  • No Zach. Joanne’s not fine. I doubt she ever was.
  • Angela got a lot older looking than Hiro did in the same time span.
  • How was Invisible Girl going to protect Malina when she can’t even sneak up on Angela, with her eyes closed, doing her Hail Marys?
  • Poor Otomo-San. This is very AI-ish.
  • How can Nathan send people to places he’s never seen?
  • Yeah Molly, you might not want to be too fast to say you’d rather die than do anything.
  • Why didn’t Nathan have to worry about absorbing Molly’s power?
  • Why doesn’t Hiro just go with them? Isn’t he more of a loose end if he stays?
  • A sword might be the single worse weapon to use against clone guy.
  • I don’t think Tommy’s Mom was that good in the clinch.
  • Why did Caspar have to take everything, when he just took a day from HRG?
  • Quentin’s alive!
  • Dammit, Quentin.

Once Upon A Time, S5E07: “Nimue”

Spoiler Thoughts:
  • Well politeness always matters.
  • The real end of “The Defiant Ones.”
  • These middlemyst flowers are pretty popular in Camelot.
  • Emma’s got some OCD behaviors going on.
  • Well this seems like a fun quest.
  • Oh man, Merlin is kinda credulous.
  • These are some bad decisions Merlin is making.
  • Hey, the first person I’d be listening to is freaking Zelina.
  • This is probably when Merlin should have had some warning lights go off.
  • Oh come on, Snow. You were a fighter.
  • Guess who?
  • Now really, who didn’t call this?
  • This is only a surprise twist to people who are unfamiliar with the legend of Arthur and Merlin.
  • I think she’s already pretty dark.
  • Dude, she’s just not that into you.
  • I think he had a point–if you didn’t want your magic used violently, you probably shouldn’t have made it into a sword.
  • Nice scene for Jennifer Morrison! Even if the victory is transitory, it’s a great moment for Emma.
  • Glad everyone trusted Zelina again.
  • So basically, by bringing Zelina with them, they caused the whole thing.
  • Also, if Robin had been able to use a little restraint/precautions in his home life, we wouldn’t be in this predicament either.
  • How did Zelina communicate with Arthur and come up with this whole plan if she was mute?
  • I feel like we haven’t explained sufficiently why Merlin, with all his powers, wasn’t able to stop all this, if he was out and about and aware back when Emma was little.
  • Except for Rumple and Nimue, all the Dark Ones were jawas?
  • Wootini.

Dragon Age Inquisition Thoughts: Trespasser, Part 2

Spoiler Thoughts:

  • Oh yay! More talking!
  • Aw. Cullen made it up with Blackwall.
  • Clasping maw is one expensive sword.
  • People certainly seem to want to discuss Solas all of a sudden.
  • Well ok, they had an eluvian just sitting around the Winter Palace and no one said anything?
  • Welcome back to the Deep Roads.
  • Man, it’s dark in here.
  • I guess we’re supposed to use our new hand-as-flashlight ability, but hard to think that’s not going to give us cancer one day.
  • Wow, for some reason certain actions are totally delayed now. Like it takes her ten minutes to decide to climb up a ladder.
  • Lyrium grows on trees?


  • The story in any BioWare game inevitably has you start blowing up stuff without figuring out how you’re going to leave.
  • Teagan, you did not age well.
  • I feel like normally you wouldn’t have the Inquisitor managing servant squabbles.
  • Like Cullen wouldn’t take care of his own guys?
  • Well given that neither the heads of Ferelden nor Orlais are at this convention, I think it’s kind of an exaggeration to say the South would be “rudderless” if we all blew up.
  • Sandal’s diary!
  • Exactly as you’d expect.
  • Always a little suspicious when you run into an empty place with two supply caches.
  • Ugh, I am totally failing some of these optional puzzles.
  • Oh great, so it was our fault after all.
  • Ok, it seems as though everyone is pretty quick to accept that I’m not going to survive this hand thing.
  • Like, nothing like “oh don’t worry–we’ll get you the best doctor,” just “good luck with that. We’ll go start packing.”
  • I am totally failing this veil fire puzzle, and Bull and Dorian constantly saying “it didn’t work” isn’t helping.
  • Well, guess we’ll kill more Qunari.
  • I don’t know what we thought “Dragon’s Breath” referred to, anyway.
  • Good thing all the Qunari charge through the doorway past me without giving me a second glance.
  • Poor Bull. This must be awkward.
  • Solas, you rat.
  • Say, this hand thing seems to be decompensating.
  • I guess we’re not picking up any more loot at this point.
  • For eluvians all over the place, this is pretty linear.
  • This is a lot of Qunari to go rogue, according to the government.
  • Yes, I do have some questions, thank you.
Don’t you “it’s not you, it’s me” me!
  • Look Solas, I’m not sure why we all have to die, just because you feel guilty that no one can go to the library again.
  • Even though he’s being a bit of a jerk, I feel like this romanced elven inquisitor wouldn’t give up on him.
  • Oh, he left.
  • Oh, I guess we left.
  • Oh, I guess we left our hand there.
  • If this Inquisitor still wanted to try to get Solas back, I think she’d divest herself of the big organization and try to redeem him on her own, with just a handful of BFFs.
  • I declare thee DISBANDED.
  • Aw, the Citadel everybody-stand-in-a-line-and-stare-at-the-player-and-then-peel-off-forever scene.
  • Oh, I guess we were serious about going after Solas.
  • All the advisors stayed but Cullen, who left with his dog?
  • Well I guess now we know why this was the last DAI DLC–on to the Search for Solus.
  • Wow, these epilogue cards are pretty fast.
  • BioWare credits are the longest things ever, but you always have to stay through to the end in case Buzz Aldrin is tacked on after or something.
  • Oh, Cassandra’s reading Varric’s book.
  • Oh, I am DYING.
  • Man, I love Cassandra.
  • Alright.  Time to cue up my first Inquisitor for a second go-around, while I wait for Andromeda.


Heroes Reborn, Season One, Episode 107: “June 13th: Part One”

Image from NBC.com

Spoiler Thoughts:

  • Mohinder the Handsome is back!
  • I have a hard time thinking Erica could hoodwink Angela Petrelli so thoroughly. Angela was always pretty sneaky.
  • Old Hiro! He looks so much happier when he’s wearing the glasses.
  • Oops. Say hi to Kevin Flynn in there, Hiro.
  • Oh Phoebe is going full Anakin in this one.
  • How are Zachary and his not-yet-psycho wife going to take this kid to an outdoor festival, when any exposed skin instantly burns to a crisp?
  • Molly in her pre-skank days.
  • Why are HRG and Hiro even bothering to sneak around, when Hiro can just freeze everyone and they could walk around checking everything out at leisure?
  • I guess we’re not going with the Lazarus Effect on this time-travel model.
  • Yeah, Hiro–you might not want to chop this dude into too many pieces.
  • Never bring a knife to a clone fight.
  • Ok wait. Are we thinking that the bombs cloned as well?
  • How could all the alternatives to all those people exploding be worse?
  • I bet this poor water-freezing EVO is the first one Zach and his wife off.
  • Twins! I bet they take one to Alderaan, and one to Tatooine.
  • I really feel like HRG would look at Claire’s face. I don’t even know that they would cover her, given that she wasn’t in an accident or anything, and probably looks fine.
  • I also don’t get how a cardiac arrest would kill her. She came back from being burnt almost to ashes, and I’m pretty sure she died of cardiac arrest then, too.
  • I’m guessing “Tommy” isn’t his real name.
  • Actually, I think it would have been more fun if Angela had named the son “Sylar,” after the son she tried to manipulate into believing was her son.
  • HRG seems a lot readier for Angela Petrelli to raise his grandchildren than I would be.
  • Hiro and the baby. Cutest.
  • Man, I knew that RN looked familiar.
  • Nathan definitely got the “Uncle Owen/Aunt Beru” end of the stick on this one.
  • HRG is sick and tired of not being able to shoot anyone.
  • Why would HRG try to stop himself, when he already knows Erica is going to kill everyone?

Once Upon A Time, S5E06: “The Bear and the Bow”

Spoiler Thoughts:
  • Apparently this week is !Sassy!Belle week.
  • Well, its not like Belle hasn’t occasionally had that coming.
  • If Belle still helps Merida after she almost killed her with a rock to the head, she’s a dope.
  • At this point, if Merida and Belle both fell in a hole for the rest of the storyline, I’d be ok with that.
  • Granny’s getting more business out of Dark Swan than she ever did out of Light Swan.
  • Zelena might actually be the smartest one in town.
  • Actually, I’m thinking smashing your own foot with a rock might be a mistake.
  • By now, I feel like a bear might be a better ruler than Merida.
  • Oh hey,  Arthur.  Surely nothing will go wrong here.
  • Ok David.  I’m taking back the apology from last week.
  • Well I guess if you couldn’t hit someone with an arrow in the clutch, it would make sense that you wouldn’t want to rely on your archery later.
  • Man, Robert Carlyle is so good.  He totally sells all the different Golds/Rumples.
  • BEAR.
  • Ha ha.  Belle screwed you.
  • Look, if she doesn’t take the chance to shoot all three of those guys right now, she really doesn’t deserve to rule.
  • It’s too bad Merida’s dad didn’t teach all his kids how to fight.
  • Ok, that doesn’t even look like a bear.
  • I don’t know know why anyone even bothers doing anything besides throwing rocks at each other when its so effective.
  • I feel like a really evil Emma would make a snarky comment on Gold’s heartfelt declaration.
  • Like, you can’t tell me Regina would be sitting here listening to this and not making gagging noises, even now.
  • I can’t help feeling that it should take more than one act of self-defense to prove yourself a hero.
  • OMG.  Are you telling me Arthur didn’t sit there and see if the mushroom actually burnt?
  • Henry is also one of the smartest people in this town.
  • “Hi, this is Merlin.  My message box is full right now…”